It feels like I’ve done this before, written a post-surgery post. New body part this time but same body. I am around, at home, waiting for stuff to fall into place, literally. The days I spent at the hospital were a blast. I had a bunch of nurses and a handful of doctors poking, squeezing, cutting and feeding me. Life passed fast for three, four days, always someone by my side. And at the same time the minutes passed so slow. I got really excited when I saw the menu the first day but unfortunately eating was not the first priority. The two doctors came in every day and told me surgery was a success, two thumbs up. 30 something shining staples in a beautiful row on my tummy. Awesome. I came in fresh and mobile and crawled out a vegetable. I can tell you, I didn’t feel or look that fresh. Surgery is not at all like in the movies, you don’t wake up fresh, smiling and ready to sit up. You wake up with a sore throat, unable to speak, unable to move and with a button in your hand to press to keep the morphine coming.
The first thing I wanted was black coffee and they all thought it was kind of odd. I had my room close to the kitchen so I smelled the coffee for almost 24 hours before I could ask for a cup. I stood up on my own two legs without passing out and walked a few yards a few hours later. Big success. All motivated by the coffee maker 15 yards away.
I learned the shifts the nurses worked and I also had to work on how to hold on to my tummy when I laughed. They were all great. After constantly setting off the alarm on the heart monitor the first 12 hours, they realized that I wasn’t actually dying, I was just very, very calm.
I felt scared in a weird way when I knew the night nurse started her shift. She was really nice but I had no chance getting a say in what was about to happen. She came in every hour and turned me from side to side, even if that meant waking me up or turning me away from the tv.
And then I went home. It felt great to take a shower and sleep. And then I tried to cut out the medicine and get back to normal. It didn’t work that great so I am back down. Yesterday I accomplished two things, I got dressed and I watched a whole movie without falling asleep. I’ve tried about 10 times the past few days and I must say yesterday was a success. And who knows what today will bring. I put on real pants this morning.