It’s getting closer, the wonderful Christmas is almost here. How magic and bright. They just said on the news that it’s seven days until Christmas, but that is not true. It’s six days until the real Christmas, the 24^th. Everywhere around me people are asking if I’m ready for Christmas. What do you think? This is a recurring affair, this last-minute prep and shop thing. I am behind, that seem to be the theme of this year, behind on everything. But I am pretty sure it all will happen anyway, it will be merry and bright, magical and marvelous. And I am sorry for sounding a bit sour and bitter. Life is a constant battle, some months you walk up front and wave the flag, on top of things and have time for it all. Friends, cooking, family, fun stuff, training. And some months are like December, an endless slog of shores and not a whole lot of fun until the big day. And then it’s like popping a balloon, all the air just vanishes, and you sit there and watch your kids with a glass in your hand, very satisfied and happy.

I think the problem is that we need light and the magic of light. The sky is grey, and the days are still short and dark. I miss Lucia, the early morning of the 13^th. The smell of saffron and coffee. The candles and singing in church. The bright and white classy displays of Christmas lights in dark trees. The slushy snow and the cold air. It’s all about the smells again, I miss the smells of home. It is nothing you can recreate with a Yankee candle, a synthetic mixture of fake Christmas.

The live fast, die young thing might have worked for Jesus. I don’t like the living fast thing. I want long walks in the woods, long runs or hikes in the mountains, endless dinners, lazy mornings in bed.

News this morning covered the impeachment and the ultimate Christmas wrapping and the stress it consists of. The mix is fascinating. Get real people, how hard can it be. They are talking binge wrapping sessions. Honestly. This makes me sad. And the impeachment, not a day too early.

What do you want for Christmas? Meat thermometer, a nerf gun, a cashmere sweater, a car. I always say that I want happy kids and something that smells good. And that is still true. But also, I want light. Light in the sky, light in our minds and hearts (And a new Burberry scarf).